In a Netflix series called Sex Education, Colin, the medical teacher, the man practically responsible for sexual education, is afraid to speak dirty to his girlfriend, Emily. She seems to want him to call her a bitch, however, all Colin could respectfully say is a lovely female puppy. Unmistakably, it is going to ruin the mood.
The series is fictional, but the problem is genuine. Men wish to be extra vigilant about respect and consent in the age of #MeToo, obviously. Calling a girl a bitch in the midst of making love may sound, indeed contradictory to this goal.
Talking dirty allows you to explore your darkest, deepest desires safely and, according to study, there is a strong possibility that your girlfriend likes it. In a poll of over 4,000 Americans, Justin Lehmiller, PhD, a research associate at Indiana University’s Kinsey Center, observed that 93% of females had fantasized regarding their husband talking dirty to them, and 56% frequently fantasized about it.
Attempting to bring up something that is likely to sound sexy in the spur of the moment could be hard, not to forget, things could turn uncomfortable pretty easily if it does not eventually come out as hot as it did in your mind.
A lot of men have no clue about how to talk dirty to a girl and it’s nothing to be ashamed of, our values, culture and upbringing have a role to play in too. Further, you could get really good at it, talking dirty isn’t rocket science after all!
Related: 10 Ways To Interact With A Girl
Another thought that seems to deter men from talking dirty is that, is it safe to just put something dirty out there if you and your wife or girlfriend haven’t talked dirty with each other ever before?
Obviously, the preferences and choices of women differ so there’s no set of sentences that you could just copy-paste and necessarily impress your partner. You must consider the taste of your partner and add a personal touch to the dirty talk to increase your chance of hitting it off.
So here’s your guide to talk dirty to a girl:
1. Check your Tone
Folks, do you ever hear a girl’s voice, particularly one that is exceptionally loud, and it just hits you deep within? For which are you all squirming and wanting to hug her real good?
Such a tone can also trigger this kind of primal, defensive instinct that we guys feel deep inside (it feels amazing, doesn’t it really?). You know what I’m saying, the kind of voice which tends to make the hardest of us men blush? Yeah, that voice is playful, sweet, fragile, and pleasant.
So, what if I told you that women admired the complete opposite of that voice? Females from all around the world seem to cater well to men with more resonant and deep voices.
Much like we do not experience fear when we hear a cat’s high-pitched meows, but we feel more or less an instinctive fear when we hear a bear’s low howl, the various pitches of various human voices make our bodies react in different ways, a few of them make us conscious, some of these we can not put our fingers on so quickly.
2. Dullness isn’t so bad
Take the time to practice keeping the voice down. A low voice used by a man often reflects confidence, but it is vital that you keep it monotonous and do not vary too much with the pitch of your voice.
Practicing low voice tone can be conducted conveniently in the mirror to get better. After that, you could try it in real-life conversations and start talking to your friends in a lower, steadier accent, as-needed.
Have some practice, have fun doing it, and practice how to switch it on and off if you might require it in a number of social scenarios. Although views about sex have transformed since the old Bond movies, body language and voice tone have not changed, Connery’s self-assurance and smirk coupled with a flirtatious eyebrow hasn’t, and even new Bonds have caught up with it.
Sophistication should not have to broadcast its arrival to warn everyone that it is sophistication, it is what it is. Apart from improving your dirty talking skills, such a tone would help you otherwise too, as you could convey a wider set of emotions with it.
3. Know the limits
Talking dirty could vary dramatically – some may like it extra-dirty, whereas others like it to be rather mild. Do not assume that your partner wants to be called insulting names or cured at, get to know their preferences.
Again, bear in mind that there really is a thin line between what is all right and what is unacceptable. Your partner may appreciate when you call them those terms, but there’s always a chance that they feel insulted, be aware of how they respond to your words and show them that you value their sentiments.
Honestly, there aren’t many things hotter than hearing your girl’s breath tickle your ear as she tells you to strip off her clothes? If you like the sound of that (which is really hard to not like), you can imagine how it could make your woman feel when you return the favor back.
It is such an instant turn-on, you could perhaps make a remark about the weather, and you sound sexy even then. (but do not take that one out of the bedroom). Essentially, just adjust everything from your dirty-talking arsenal to a whisper, and you will be sure to take your game to a different level!
The dirtytalk introduces up an entirely new aspect to a sexual encounter that reaches beyond the physical sphere. If you feel that way; give this guide a shot, do something different and hopefully have fun with it.
To sum it up, be confident and bold but always respect the boundaries. Putting passion into what you mean conveys conviction and lets your partner realize that you really enjoy the sexual intimacy that you have with them.