We, humans, are emotional beings by birth. We need somebody to confide in, we want acceptance, we want appreciation, we want to be loved, to be made to feel special. We want friends who can look out for us in times of need, who can cater to our emotional needs, who do not give up on us. 

Such emotional needs exist in almost every individual, be it a man or a woman, a 10-year-old, or a 60-year-old. Some find it in their friends, some in their parents, and many find it in their partners. We feel like these people complete us because they make us happy and content. Emotional needs, when not catered to properly or not encouraged in the right direction, might lead to feelings of frustration and anxiety in human beings. 

Emotional needs of men

It is this society’s general traditional understanding that men do not cry, and that they are strong enough emotionally to handle their life problems themselves. This belief has stifled men and prevented them from expressing any of their emotional needs publically for a long number of years. Society often tends to showcase men as these physical animals that only need sex, sustenance, and sleep to survive. Men’s need to stretch beyond physical needs.

Emotional needs

Well, now that society is working each day towards promoting a more inclusive environment where everyone is free to feel, express, and act in the way they wish to, it is necessary to understand that men too need emotional support. They need to be loved and supported in their life decisions, in times when they’re going through some bad phase in life or otherwise.

How can we give men the emotional support they need?

Here are a few ways we feel men can be made to feel wanted and loved and can be supported emotionally:

1. Respect:

Most men are really enthusiastic about their goals and decisions. They need their partners or their close ones to respect those decisions. If you’re a woman, there is a high tendency that whenever your partner tells you about the latest car model he finds appealing or that new property he finds profitable, you ward off his talks or you don’t listen to him properly, because you do not like the topic of the conversation. However, you would always want him to be responsive when you would want him to choose a dress for you. Insensitive much, eh? 

Well, we believe one shall never tend to belittle someone’s excitement about something, however small that thing might be. Let us try to listen a bit more.

2. Love: 

Women always want their man to express his love for them in front of the entire world, without any fear. However, most women generally do not want to do it the other way. This is where the problem arises. Feeling loved is a part of emotional support that many men struggle with. The next time you feel something about a person, let them know about it. Try to make the men in your life feel more loved, more often.

3. Encouragement: 

It is quite a lot of times true that the bravado picture of men that is visible to our eyes is actually a façade, and a deeply emotional person who needs our help lurks beneath this picture. Every man needs a person to share his deepest insecurities with, he needs a safe place where he is not required to portray the macho man picture anymore and he can be assured that he will be loved.

Encouragement from a loved one never gets old, and men need to be encouraged too, in their career paths, business, appearances, everything. This encouragement instills confidence in men that helps them get through tough phases and bad days in life. 

man wearing red long-sleeved shirt standing beside wall

Emotional needs

4. Acceptance: 

Many times, men are insecure about their appearances or their jobs, etc. they try hard to fit in the definition of a man in the words of society. They try to be emotionally more indifferent, they try to gym and have abs, they try to appear nothing short of strong and masculine. In this endeavor of trying to be what society expects them to be, a lot of times, they tend to lose their own identities and unique personalities and become someone who they are not.  

One thing we can most importantly do for any men in our lives is to accept them for who they are, to love them for their own strengths and weaknesses, to appreciate their personalities. So, the next time you try to belittle any man for his appearances or for his low salary job, think about it twice. Let’s not be so hard on each other, instead let us make an environment where men feel safe enough to express their emotional needs, and are not portrayed as someone who is just naturally emotionally deranged or distanced.  

Men’s struggle for emotional support

Patriarchy and the years-long expectations that have been build in this society have always made it difficult for men to express their feelings. The general notion that men do not cry makes them feel like a weak kid if they succumb to crying after a long day of struggle at work one day. The mere idea that they will have to openly tell their loved ones about the anxiety that they are going through or that they are feeling restless in their hearts makes them feel like a sin or a weakness in itself. 

Men have long struggled for opening up about needing emotional support, and are still going through it, to some extent.

As family members, as partners, as wives, as children, as a society, need to make men realize that it is okay, in fact, it is important to express their emotional needs. We need to keep in mind men’s struggle with emotional support and need to respect the emotional need of a man. 

Let us not make them feel small or ward off their desires for emotions and feelings. As men, we need love and affection, as much as any other gender!

Dear men, we understand 🙂